


you at the end of the world

by downthedarkpath



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, History, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, Non-liner timeline, Reincarnation, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 13:42:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29701443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/downthedarkpath/pseuds/downthedarkpath
Summary: It’s everything. Sapnap is everything. Karl has been there throughout it all, and will be there for everything else, and Sapnap will always be the most beautiful thing in the world.
Relationships: Karl Jacobs/Sapnap
Comments: 23
Kudos: 109





	you at the end of the world

**Author's Note:**

> so.... enjoy this!

The first time Karl sees Sapnap, he’s dying. It’s 1349 on the coast of England, and Sapnap is lying on his deathbed. 

Plague, of course. Karl couldn’t save him even if he tried. He may defy the laws of time, but not even he could break the will of a god. He can watch from afar and bring his regrets deep into the future, but Sapnap, this Sapnap, must live out his destiny alone. 

Karl watches his skin, pale and red in equal parts, coated in a sheen of sweat and mottled with those awful pus-filled buboes. He watches as Sapnap writhes in discomfort beneath the summer heat, trapped within the confines of his body as it betrays him. He watches, and he prays to a God he hasn’t ever believed in, but there is nothing to be done. 

The air outside is choked with salt and miasma - the air inside is saccharine and sickly and sweet with all manner of herbs as the physicians attempt to ward off the wrath of the devil. It is heavy and cloying both inside and out, like being stuffed full with cotton balls, and Karl knows how it will all fail. That, if nothing else, hurts most. 

The streets are infected with the corpses, and Karl hates that Sapnap will become nothing more than buried bones. His body, poisoned, will be left to rot. It feels like the greatest betrayal. 

Sapnap will spend five days in a steady decline, and then a sixth in the deepest reaches of hell as his body attempts to cling on, before his soul will finally be taken. Karl watches for all of them, feeling hopeless, and wonders if death is now a mercy. 

The day Sapnap dies is sombre, but that is hardly different to any of the other days. The church bells haven’t stopped ringing since the disease first dug its claws into England, and the streets are a cacophony of inevitable, endless fear and prayer, and worst of all, silence. 

His death, whilst it rocks Karl’s world, has no impact on anyone else. Death, now, has become synonymous with life, and to have one without the other would be a blessing no one is deserving of.

Sapnap’s death is just another day, for better or for worse. A thousand other patients contract the plague, and when Sapnap’s body is thrown to the dogs, he rests among a hundred other corpses, until Karl cannot tell one from another. It is with this that he leaves, and behind him lies a century of fear and terror and loss.

Death may be a mercy, as much as life is a curse. Turning away from Sapnap’s grave feels like a knife in his back. Pain, at least, is a welcome reprieve. 

* * *

The skies in 2149 are dusty. The clouds are yellow, like fire. Sapnap does not fit in here. He lives in the past, in his memories. He wears the clothes of a century that has long since passed, and he does not move with the time. He paves a path of his own and doesn’t follow it, and Karl could almost think he was mourning someone.

* * *

They’re in France, and King Charles VII is addressing his subjects. His acquisition of the throne is a hurried one, in the midst of war, and everyone is desperate. Karl lingers at the door - he is unwelcome here - but Sapnap is getting drafted for the French military.

He doesn’t want Sapnap in conflict, but he is young and strong and beautiful. Godlike. Karl knows that they will rebel, and he hopes only that Sapnap will be on the right side of history; of his future.

Sapnap will fight in the Hundred Years War. Henry V of England will invade, and eventually, he will lose. Sapnap will die on the battlefield in 1451, and his memory will be forgotten. Joan of Arc and Charles VII will be remembered. A treaty will be signed, and Sapnap will be too far gone. 

And still, Karl cannot touch him. 

* * *

The American Revolution is in full swing, and Sapnap is existing. He reads a newspaper each morning, and he has gotten old. This is a good thing. He has no family, and few friends, but he has a cat and a book, and a painting that Karl recognises as a Renaissance piece, all reds and greens and blues, hanging on his wall. 

He is content. By extension, Karl is content too. He watches from afar, and he delivers Sapnap’s mail. He writes to him, and perhaps he shouldn’t, but he does.

_ Sapnap, _

_ My name is Karl. You don’t know me, but I know you. I hope you can forgive my overstepping, but there is something I must tell you. _

_ I want you to know this: I will always be here. _

_ I want you to know that I will always remember you, and I hope that you may retain the knowledge of my existence in return. It will make our eventual meeting so much easier. _

_ Finally, I want you to know that I love you. And one day, you will grow to love me. _

Time moves forward; it’s 1776 and the British are forced out of Boston. Sapnap doesn’t wake up. He passes, of natural causes, and now he finally looks peaceful. Karl watches the doctors come to remove his body, and he watches as one of them removes his letter from Sapnap’s breast pocket. They don’t read it, and it’s buried with his body.

He watches as Sapnap’s spirit passes, and Karl regrets that they didn’t have any longer.

* * *

9386 is lonely. Humanity has been replaced with robots, with nanotech and bio-engineering. It has been that way for as long as Karl can remember.

Sapnap looks at home here. He has a mechanical eye, his left eye, and it jerks around with a mind of its own. Karl has seen similar models on the markets, and he’s thought about getting one of his own. Sapnap’s left arm is also mechanical, and his left leg. Karl isn’t sure if it’s through necessity or if it’s a choice.

Sapnap makes it work, though. His skin looks alive caught between the silver chrome of his mechanisms, and he works with them like he’s had them for all of his lives. The engineering is a work of art - Sapnap himself belongs in a museum.

The threads of time are running away from them now. Sapnap is getting further and further away. Karl would be upset if he hadn’t already made his peace with the requirements of the future. The future now requires him and Sapnap to part, and it has been pulling them in separate directions for years.

Karl has always known it would end like this. He has always known that this is what it would come to.

It doesn’t make it any easier to let Sapnap go.

* * *

It’s quiet in 2596. Technology is moving slowly, but it is still lightyears ahead of what it has been. Sapnap is adjusting - he works at a radio station now. His life is slow, and humanity is being replaced; his reports are limited to typing the words into a generator and having a robot read them off for him.

Karl can see the frustration settle deep in his bones. He can no longer get close, he must watch from just behind a window, and it is hurtful when all he wants is to hold him now he knows Sapnap is just at the end of his rope, that he is about to quit.

It is his last chance to act.

“...in the biggest L’manbergian election in years, we bring you -  _ Sapnap. Sapnap. Sapnap. I have a message for you. I have always loved you. I have always been with you. I will always be with you. I have loved you and I will love you, and you are not alone. You are not alone _ \- J. Schlatt, on what he plans to do first as President…”

That evening, Sapnap resigns. He cuts the tape, he isolates the message, and he replays it well into the night. Karl leaves him with his head in his hands, and he wishes, he always wishes he could have done more.

* * *

It is a cold day in Italy, and Sapnap is sitting at an easel. He has a paintbrush in hand, and his jacket is off. The canvas, however, is empty. Karl wonders if he remembers.

He stands in the doorway, hoping Sapnap will look up. He cannot make the first contact, not yet, but Sapnap can.

He doesn’t. He paints strokes of red and green and the deepest blue Karl has ever seen. His heart has drowned so long ago, buried with Sapnap’s skeleton after the plague. It is a curse to remember.

The world is healing, slowly. There is still tragedy. There is still pain. There are steps taken forward and even more taken backwards. But here, today’s Sapnap stands at an easel and he paints, and Karl watches.

Sapnap has a library in the corner. Karl can’t peruse it - he’s read all of its contents before - and he has books on surgery and art and music. Sapnap is becoming a phoenix, one Karl can’t keep up with.

He doesn’t wait around to watch him die this time. He leaves with a memory of Sapnap painting, free and happy and beautifully alive in 1627, and it is enough to fix the battlefield in his head, enough to clean the battleaxe. Not for the first time, he thinks he is an awful voyeur, condemned to watching his lover suffer. He wonders who he is hurting more.

* * *

He is in rural America, and it’s deserted except for the small town on the horizon.

Here, Karl knows, is where Sapnap waits for him.

The SMP is more than he expected. It’s everything. Sapnap is everything. Karl has been there throughout it all, and will be there for everything else, and Sapnap will always be the most beautiful thing in the world.

They kiss beneath a mushroom under the stars, in Alyssa’s barn, in his library. He finally gets to hold him, gets to see him and be near. The threads of time that are pulling them are twisted together.

Karl knows they will untangle all too soon, and it  _ will  _ be too soon, but he makes the most of it. Sapnap’s touch is warm, and his heart is loud, and his kisses are soft. There are words that should be said but don’t need to be, because this is what they have both been waiting for.

They have come home.

They get married. They love easily. Karl gets to live out his life with Sapnap, and this time neither of them are running to catch up. They make friends. They have a family.

For once, Sapnap is not alone.

Now, after everything, Karl is afraid to move on. They’re older. George has passed, Dream has left them, the trees have died, and the SMP has become far bigger than the two of them.

“I’ll remember you,” is what Sapnap whispers that night. “I’ll never forget you.”

It’s everything but a goodbye, and yet they both know what Sapnap means. Karl takes solace in the words. He knows them to be untrue, he knows that Sapnap won’t remember him anymore, but he holds them close all the same. It’s a vague, if misplaced, affirmation to his previous attempts at contact, but it means the world. It means everything.

“I know you will,” he whispers back, because Sapnap is waiting for something. Karl thinks he might be waiting for something too. “I love you. I’ll find you. I’ll always find you.”

Sapnap doesn’t wake up the next morning. Karl allows himself to feel the pain. For once in his life, he grieves.

* * *

Sapnap is wearing a green shirt and red pants. He is dancing to the Stones and the Beatles, and America is racing Russia to the skies. It should be a time for patriotism, for celebration, and yet Karl feels like he is being condemned to an ugly fate.

He sends another letter, and he hopes Sapnap will remember it. Deep in his heart, he knows he won’t. He knows he will never receive a letter back.

_ Sapnap, _

_You probably don’t remember me. We’ve met before, a long time ago._ _I have something to tell you, and you mustn’t tell anyone. These words are for your eyes only, and I sincerely hope you remember them._

_ I have loved you since the beginning of time. I have loved you for years. I am waiting for the day when you will love me back and I know it is coming soon. I only hope you will remember this, that you remember me. _

_ And yet I know, and have always known that it is a lost cause. _

Love, Karl believes, is worth more than death. And he has had enough of that for a lifetime.

When Armstrong and Aldrin land on the moon in ‘69, Karl wishes he could be there with them. He wishes he could be in the grasp of an eternal space, and whilst the intricacies of time are spread out in front and behind him, he knows there will never be enough. He will never have enough time, and it will run out eventually.

* * *

Queen Victoria is on the British throne, and Sapnap has returned to London. Karl follows him there - knows he would follow him anywhere. The city is now thick with smog and steam and coal. It is a welcome change from the miasma and the herbs from 1349, but it is just as heavy, and cholera is on the rise. Death is following him.

Karl knows he cannot fix it, but he keeps Sapnap away from the contaminated sources. He doesn’t want to watch him die again, not yet.

Sapnap works as a professor of Surgery, and he is saving lives. Karl watches each one, and he hopes he can save Sapnap’s life too, when it comes to it. There is still a century of time to go before he can touch him.

He follows Sapnap to work, and home again, and he lives just out of reach. Karl must wait for their timelines to cross, finally, and he is growing impatient. 

Throughout the course of this lifetime, Sapnap remains alone. Karl doesn’t entertain the notion that perhaps he’s waiting for something. He thinks it, he wonders if Sapnap knows he’s there, but he doesn’t let himself believe it.

Sapnap dies in 1832. Death must catch up with all of them, and Karl has been teasing him. In the end, Karl shouldn’t have worried about the cholera outbreaks, for Sapnap passes from the White Plague. His death is slow, and Karl has a long time to reflect on the cruelties of Mother Earth, and all that he can’t do about them.

  
  


* * *

Sapnap looks beautiful under the blue artificials in 5628. The sky is alive with them - or what’s left of the sky. This far into the future, everything is dark, and the sun is automated, and the moon hasn’t woken up in a while. The stars are drowned out by the lights of everything else, and humanity has lost its way.

The lights suit Sapnap. His skin glows beneath them, flushing the warm undertones from his cheeks. He’s gotten tattoos since Karl saw him last, and they react to the colours, moving with a mind of their own.

Karl doesn’t dare get any closer, not anymore. Time has a thousand laws and Karl is not the master of them. He couldn’t come closer even if he tried, and for now he’s content to watch from afar. Sapnap looks every bit as beautiful as he always has been.

* * *

In 499, Sapnap is sent out of Athens to rebel against the Persians. There will be invasions and battles and revolts, and the rebellion will eventually be defeated. Karl knows this. Sapnap will not be there for them.

Karl follows him, follows the battle. He doesn’t like it, but he watches Sapnap as he fights and fights and fights, and he continues to watch even as Sapnap dies.

Sapnap has died his share of messy deaths, and this is no exception. He bleeds out on the battlefields, drowns amongst the blood of his friends and his enemies, and there is nothing Karl can do to save him. There never is, and he wonders if that could be a good thing. If an early death is better than a lifetime of pain. If dying is worth the hero’s memorial, and Karl knows Sapnap will never be remembered like that.

* * *

In 3487, Sapnap gets hit by a rogue car-carriage. He spends a day in a hospital, healing a broken leg. He is blind in his left eye, and he walks with a limp, but he is alive. 

Technology has progressed, but not far enough. All Karl can do is watch as Sapnap heals and lives, and dies, and favours his right side for the rest of his natural life.

* * *

The Earth is a battlefield in THE END. Sapnap lies upon the soil, and he rots slowly. Karl sits as close as he can, and feels the most painful betrayal that he must live while Sapnap cannot. The sky is ablaze with flame, and a thick layer of ash coats the surface. It’s suffocating. It’s been like this for months. A long time coming.

The morning Sapnap had died was bittersweet. Not cold, not warm. Lonely, but not alone. Karl couldn’t have prevented it. His only grace is that it was quick, that it was easy and painless. A bullet embedded between his eyes, executory but merciful. 

Now, Sapnap is half-buried in dirt. In bodies. In regrets and memories. In the weight of all of his lives, and Karl can only stay so close. He can only watch as the sky burns down around them; he can’t do anything and he knows. He knows in his soul that this is when it ends.

It is deeply unfair. 

He wishes that he could fall victim to nature’s cruelty instead. As well. Together.

But it is Sapnap who passes, Sapnap who suffers, and Sapnap who pays the consequences. All Karl has left of him is gone. And at the end of the world, all that is left is you.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!!! this is one of my proudest fics, to the point ive posted it in a different fandom and sent it to my english teacher. shrugs. i just think it fits really well with the whole time travel arc going on with tales rn!
> 
> would love to hear some thoughts <3
> 
> see me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/ERR0RGEO)!


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